Dear reader,

After nine months, thirty-six long form posts, countless meaningful connections—including virtual meetups and even a Substack-to-IRL friend made!—I have reached the milestone of 100+ subscribers!

It’s been a journey filled with creativity, self discovery, self enlightenment, and perhaps most exciting of all, admiration for watching other women share their lives in such a way it both enthralls and expands me.

I spent the last two months working on a rebrand for this publication, because where I began is not where I am now.

I’d started by writing about my deepening relationship with a benevolent, kind, totally-non-denominational Godly force, as a “recovering Catholic”.

I believe someone can have faith without adhering to a particular religion, while still being in touch with the beautiful and bountiful force of God. And that’s what I sought to explore and write about.

I wish I’d had a better experience with Catholicism growing up. I really do. While I now feel happy for anyone who genuinely enjoys being Catholic, the truth is, it left me with emotional trauma and programmed blocks that to this day I’m working hard to move past.

The Catholic experience I had was one of shaming, one of subjugation. One that, whether directly or not, conveyed that women are subordinate to men. That women’s bodies are secondary, and that a woman’s primary purpose is to reproduce children. That masturbation and physical pleasure aren’t for girls, and only loosely tolerated for boys. That gay people are wrong to exist the way they are. That a heavy, clenching shame is something one should wear like a second skin throughout one’s life. That if you do something wrong, you should beat yourself up and give yourself hell for it. Better to have never made any mistakes at all. Better to have been perfect.

It took years to even be able to read the word '“God” and not inwardly erupt in anger and judgement and derision toward the person who innocently wrote it.

Cosmic Crumbs

Through quite a bit of reprogramming and shedding over the better part of a decade, I completely redefined my concept of a divine force, and got to a place where I was excited and felt an awesome degree of community and co-creation with it, And yes, I eventually started calling this force “God.” I also call it the universe. Source. The divine. Sometimes she’s a woman. Other times he’s a man. For me, it matters a lot less what I label it than it does what I believe its intentions and might are.

I’ve found peace with my version of what God is, and peace in how I live out my days with my belief in this divinity.

So when it came to rebranding my work and words here on Substack, I wanted a name that spoke to my belief in a greater force, but that also spoke to my passions and what I’m currently writing about — the journey of inner work, exploration, and building a life that reflects one’s true and unique authenticity.

This is my Canva creation, which I am very proud of and think is just darling.

There’s just one problem - at this exact moment, it feels a bit… performative? Overwhelming? Unnecessary?

Like… I need the perfect name and the perfect logo and fleshed-out content pillars and a Notes strategy and dedicated time in my days for community management and to summon creativity on command and define paid tiers and to make money from my writing and to one day make enough money from my writing that I’ll be able to quit my corporate job and pursue writing and creative passions full-time and then I’ll be fulfilled and happy.

All from a logo swap.

To say, or to share?

Platforms like Substack—and all its social media & blogging predecessors—make it very easy to share.

But in an age of extreme ease to pull the trigger and release out into the world what you think, how you live, your perspectives and thoughts, it’s worth dedicating some time to think about the vast difference between the life you create vs. what you want to share about the life you create with strangers (even the ones that become friends) on the internet.

I’ve written about my life and private-turned-public thoughts thirty-six times in the last year, and now I’m not sure what I want to share. What’s more interesting is that I’m not sure I want to share anything for at least a little while.

Last week I took a long lunch to visit an arboretum with one of my girlfriends. It was one of those breathlessly gorgeous spring days with a gentle but refreshing breeze, the soft squish of saturated earth beneath your feet, and rays of sunlight that were literally visible.

As we strolled and chatted, I found myself, almost unconsciously, stopping to take some photos of the grounds. After a moment, I realized it was literally just so I could post them on Substack later. As truly delightful and incongruously magical Substack is—being both a social media platform and a charming corner of the internet—I knew I had a problem when I halted mid-sentence and mid-stride to capture a photo just to post on freaking social media.

That is absolutely not aligned with my truest authenticity or highest self.

And really, would me creating these posts and pouring my heart and soul and countless hours into getting my thoughts onto the page and producing a final work product I’m proud of be any less meaningful if I than if I privately printed and tucked the final draft away rather than send it to 100+ inboxes? Put it in a memory box in my office that I just show to my kids one day?

Would the wellness influencer/podcaster I’m slightly obsessed with (who does make, by my estimation and what she’s shared, over $300K or so per year through her business) be any less cool of a person if she didn’t post all of her wellness habits and practices online? If she just…lived them?

I don’t think so. I think she and I think I would still be pretty badass. Just not making income from those particular activities of badassery.

Should we aim to make income from our passions?

I’ve seen and been inspired by so many amazing women here on Substack who’ve turned what they share—their art, their creations—into income. I admire them more than I can say for their ability to do so, and ~ I admit ~ there are moments when I feel insufferably jealous of them.

A question I’ve been kicking around lately though as I explore all sorts of purpose and passion-driven work I could pursue is:

Should our ultimate aspiration be to derive income from our passions and/or purpose? Does our income have to stem from our authenticity? Or can authenticity, as long as your source of income doesn’t actively degrade it, be separate from what you do for work?

Can I go to my somewhat dull corporate job, spend the day around generally nice people and a lovely manager, sit outside in the sunny courtyard my office has, answer some emails and clickity-clackity spend the day monitoring a rarely overwhelming inbox, close my computer at 5pm then go home to my fiancé and my books and my baked goods and my friends and my joyful movement routine and my inner work and the walking trails around my home and be happy and truly living my best life?

Or do I have to pursue means of work and income that are aligned with my unique gifts to share with the world in order to be a self-actualized, enlightened, or “thriving” human?

I guess only I can answer that question.

I guess every one of us can only answer it for ourselves.

Is it so wrong to consider whether that’s the point of all this? This one little big life we have, to work at anything as few hours as possible to make as much money as possible to sustain your life’s authentic desires outside of that work?

food for thought

Give me the expensive artisan cheese

Am I a bad—or *shudder* inauthentic—person for enjoying the financial comfort that my unfulfilling income source affords me?

So far this year, I’ve considered all manner of business ventures through which I could share my aligned, unique gifts with the world and make an income from.

• Cafe operator

• Authenticity coach

• Book shop & tea bar owner (there would also be sourdough cookies, which is partly where “Cosmic Crumbs” came from 🍪)

• Astrology & Human Design-informed coach

• Marketing strategy consultant for small businesses

• Full time Substacker (mind you, after nine months I don’t currently offer paid subscriptions)

All in the name of creating and finding income-generating work that aligns with my authentic self.

And I’m just going to say it, the thing you’re not supposed to say - at this stage of my life, I would not consider quitting my corporate job if not for at least the chance of making more money from a purpose-aligned venture than I currently make.

I’m not a martyr. I’m not trying to be. No disrespect whatsoever to you if your perspective differs, but I have a healthy admiration of what money can do for me and the quality of my life.

I like taking expensive trips to Michelin-guide resorts in Italy every year.

I like exclusively buying organic food, even the organic pine nuts which are ridiculously fucking expensive but taste so good in my pesto. iykyk

I like casually buying my dad a 230 euro hand-hewn, hand-forged, hand-everything chef’s knife from this dude for Father’s Day just because I thought he’d enjoy hearing about the Umbrian shop I bought it in.

I like splurging on fancy facials and massages a few times a year and tipping well after.

I like spending my corporate-made dollars supporting woman-founded, freaking awesome businesses who clearly lead from passion & purpose, like her and her.

When I was working as a cheesemonger part-time simply because I loved it, I’d thought… if I were to quit my corporate job and work full-time at this cheese shop (which they’d offered me), I’d never be able to afford all the delicious, amazing, expensive artisan cheese I could if I stayed employed at a Fortune 500.

A Creativity Colonic, if you will

I heard once that the secret to happiness is finding peace and appreciation for what you already have.

I’d really like to give myself the chance to try that with my life and income as it currently is.

I realized I am following so many truly inspiring, wonderful, badass women across social media & Substack who make their income from passion using their unique gifts.

But what I’ve started to wonder is whether I actually want that too, or if I’m telling myself to want it based on how fun and exciting and courageous and fulfilling and rewarding as everyone I see makes it seem.

I don’t know the answer right now. What I do know is that I’m not going to find out by continuing to take in all these—albeit super amazing—external voices.

I want to see how I feel about my own life, inwardly, for a while without any input or inspiration from anyone, regardless of how much I may admire them.

There’s a fine line between feeling inspired and feeling jealous. Between feeling expanded and feeling like you’re not innately enough, just as you are. Just as your life is.

So, I’m officially becoming a digital hermit for the next two weeks as I dive into my inner world, my un-influenced feelings, and true desires.

I’m taking a break from social media in all forms. Instagram, Facebook, and yes, Substack—both as a reader and a writer, because imo it’s not cool to expect others to take in my creative work as I turn a blind eye to theirs.

It’ll be a creativity colonic, if you will.

I’ll dedicate all the free time I anticipate having, which would have otherwise been filled with drafting Notes just for the algorithm, scrolling my Substack feed, going down Reels and YouTube Shorts rabbit-holes, etc., to:

• To Be Magnetic’s mid-year Authenticity Challenge

• Reading books that challenge my current thinking

• Reading books that are pure feminine smut

• Going for solo walks in the sunshine sans podcast playing

• Catching up with friends on the phone and IRL

• Testing out a schedule to keep learning Italian

• Truly feeling into my current life and work, and whether it’s something I want to change for a chance at more fulfillment, or if I’m already fulfilled for this season of my life

• Finding & eating expensive artisanal cheese

I’ll probably come back online in two weeks when this is over, to be honest.

But maybe I’ll enjoy the offline time so much I won’t want to rejoin!

Or maybe I’ll come back in a few weeks absolutely prolific, words flowing onto the page like a river surging after a storm, and feel called to write how the experience impacted me.

Maybe I’ll feel called to document my entire experience and learnings offline as I go, discerning and alchemizing for…fun?! Not for the feed.

Either way, I’m giving myself the chance to feel into my true, unadulterated desires and authenticity, and simply see what comes of it.

See you on the other side 💗

One last thing…

I listened to a recent TBM episode where the guest spoke about how, after landing in somewhat dire straits of debt, she realized that if her traditional decision-making process led her to where she is, then it stands to reason that she should do the opposite of what she’d normally do to forge her path ahead. It benefitted her immensely, and now she’s a published author and thriving using her unique gifts.

Normally to announce what I’m going to below, I’d stay up until 11p (my bed begins calling to me daily at 8:50p) every night building the “perfect” landing page, massaging my messaging so hard it loses nearly all of its original texture, having a conniption over the color palette, and overthinking every moment of every day leading up to my sending it out.

So now, I’m doing the opposite of my overworked, Type A, perfectionist ways. And it feels ~ chef’s kiss ~

Even though I’ll be offline for the next two weeks, my fiancé has very generously agreed to keep an eye on my DMs in case you shoot over any questions.

Here’s to our continued growth, evolution, and coming into our brightest, most aligned selves! 🥂

I had something entirely different planned for this week’s post, but just in the last day or so I’ve been pinged to write about the dichotomy between a creator’s duty to authentic expression and their ability to earn a living from that creation.

Many of you are creators. Creators of businesses, brands, Substacks, and offerings to share with the world.

So maybe you’ve felt pressure to “find the product-market fit” or “get inside your target customer’s head” and “figure out exactly who you’re writing/cooking/acting/building for.” To fully understand who you are creating for, and ultimately selling to, before going too far down the path of your own creation.

If you’ve grappled with the degree to which you need to think about aligning your creation + art with who’s eventually going to be consuming it—what they want, what they’re looking for, what they need—this one’s for you.

** I’d like to mention that ’s posts have been extremely vindicating on this train of thought. Check out her Substack for utterly unapologetic takes on creating art—in whatever form you choose—and staying ruthlessly true to yourself in the process.**

I didn’t need to pay tens of thousands of dollars for an MBA to know that when you’re planning to launch a product or business that you’ll monetize, you should probably check first whether there’s actually a market for it. (whoops, already did 🫠)

i.e. Does someone out there actually want to spend their money on what you’re planning to create and then sell?

But what about when you’re creating something that truly taps into what you believe you were put on this earth to create?

Something that, for this season of life, springs from you like a jack-in-the-box, simply unable to be contained within four sad, windowless walls for too long?

Even when you bring to life something that represents the essence of your soul’s expression, should you first consider who the target audience is?

I recognize that harsh, jargon words like “target audience” and “customer demographic” sit poorly next to the contextual melodies we hear when we think of “creation” and “artistry”. But, it’s worth enduring the dissonance to explore the relationship.

There are two schools of thought here.

Each thought has been used by creators far and wide, each with plenty of success. By business owners. By moguls. By the women opening up a neighborhood cafe. By the writer who’s come a long way from starting a Substack from zero 😉

On one hand…

If you have aspirations of making a livelihood off of what you bring into the world, whether that’s as a singer, a chef, a coach, an architect, or a writer, you do need to think about your market and your target patron or target customer.

You can create from the heart all you want. If you have no intention of making a living off what you create, then there’s no need to align your creation with anything but your own internal voice.

But if you’re creating something so pure, so original whose value may not be fully understood or appreciated by your audience, and thus they aren’t willing to exchange their money for it, you’ll have a tough time making a livelihood.

I was listening to a podcast this morning with who hosts “She’s So Lucky.” On this episode, Les vulnerably spoke about her journey with self-employment and creating a media empire.

One thing she touched on really stayed with me: sometimes you can create something genuinely valuable, expansive, even ahead of its time—but if people don’t yet understand the beauty of it or how it fits into their lives, they won’t buy into it. Not because it’s not good.

But because creation, if left unpackaged, can easily be misinterpreted.

This made me realize that there’s a big difference between compromising your authenticity in what you create vs. learning how to translate your vision into something your audience can actually grasp, desire, and then pay you for.

*Les also used betting in a casino as a metaphor for betting on yourself, which was pretty badass. So give it a listen! ♠️♣️

On the other hand…

Your duty to yourself as a creator and/or an artist is to create something that is truly authentic to you. Your vision. Your perspective. Your desire to bring something into this world you want to see exist.

Because if you’re creating something—pouring over it with your heart and soul and time and tears—to align with someone else’s vision or appetite, then what’s the point?

I listened to another podcast from Elizabeth Endres Orrigo over at , whose latest episode is an interview with the founder of Ghia, an alcohol-free apéritif.

This founder, , spoke about how she started her business by creating the exact drink she wanted. She created from her heart, something that she wished existed in the world.

And she pointed to how easily success comes when you operate from a place of flow — a place that’s typically only reached when operating from your heart & soul. From the “zone of genius”, where your unique talents and inherent passions converge into your creation.

So… what’s the right answer?

Creating from the heart in a way that expresses every irreplicable, luminescent detail of your desire? Or reverse engineering what the market needs & wants that you could uniquely bring to fruition in order to make a living?

Maybe it’s not one or the other.

Maybe it’s creating exactly what you feel called to create, feel excited to introduce to the world, but presented in such a way that resonates.

Thank you, big fancy expensive MBA that’s currently yellowing in a jam-packed storage bin at my parents’ house for your role in helping me come to that conclusion.

Sneak peak into a post coming soon…

I believe a great deal of the results you get have to do not only with which of these strategies you begin with, but the intention and energetics at play throughout your journey.

That is a much larger topic that deserves its own post, which is coming soon! For it, I’ll feature insights from a couple of my new Substack friends. Looking at you, and !

Stay tuned!

A big part of that mission, I now realize, is encouraging and helping others to do the same. It’s why I pivoted my Substack from a spirituality-focused publication to one that more overtly explores how we can each get in touch with our divine & God-given authenticity.

Today, I’m sharing my experience so far with a very buzzy concept, one that’s made a big difference in my journey and one that I wholeheartedly believe can do the same for you—manifestation.

While I certainly don’t have all the answers to manifesting exactly what I desire quite yet, I have given manifestation my all over the past 8 months.

To show for it, I have an absolute bounty of learnings—both personal and universal—to share with you. Learnings like:

• Why the old method of “magical thinking” your way into manifesting isn’t going to bring you what you truly desire

• The universe’s only wish for us is to live a life that’s fully aligned with our unique essence & gifts

• What’s meant for us will never miss us, and what misses us was never meant for us

And another learning that brings us right here — that it’s even more important to share the journey as it is to share the final destination.

And that’s exactly what I’m here to do. Today, and every week right in your inbox.

So, let’s dive in together.

Thinking of all the programs and modalities I’ve explored in the last few years in an effort to come closer to my purpose, manifestation has quickly risen to the top of the pile.

And not the old paradigm instruction of manifestation—the “magical thinking” way, where you’re not supposed to allow any doubt or negative thoughts to enter the chat, no matter how grandiose or out of reach the thing may be.

No, I’ve been exploring and having immense gratification (and success!) with a totally different approach.

As November last year rolled around, I was at the center of a perfect storm of exposure to things that would prompt me to dive into the manifestation work that is changing my life in real time.

• TBM’s founder, , had just released her book about the program’s ethos and purpose.

• To Be Magnetic (TBM) was promoting its end of year challenge—the Return to Magic Challenge—which it described as a “guided journey to reparent your inner child, reconnect with your magic, and step into this new year as your most confident, regulated, and magnetic self yet.”

So, I read the book, signed up for the subscription to the program, and dove head-first into the challenge.

What followed was a deeeep excavation of childhood memories and recognizing inner child wounds.

We all have them; no matter how idyllic our upbringings and our parents may have been, the human experience imparts scars. It is our divine opportunity to heal those scars and realign with our truest selves while we’re here.

I also became aware of the gap between the childlike, unburdened, unadulterated, completely authentic little girl within me—before any pain, shame, trauma, and programming—and the way I’m living now.

My current corporate career. My interactions. My relationships. My decisions, both big and small. Some of my desires that are actually ego-based.

The end of year challenge was called “Return to Magic” because TBM teaches that our most vibrant, luminous, authentic selves—stripped of the bullsh*t society or our families or relationships have imprinted on us—are already within us, and truly magical.

During that challenge and since, I’ve learned to deeply appreciate the inner work that forced me to peel back the layers and determine what truly is and is not my soul’s desire.

Becoming a Chief Marketing Officer of a Fortune 500 company by the time I’m 48? Not authentic to me. Even though from ages 20 to 24, I was absolutely hell-bent on it.

One day leaving corporate life altogether (joke’s on me for getting an MBA I’m still paying off lol) and becoming self-employed with the mission of helping people live their own most thriving, authentic lives? Joyous music to my soul’s ears 👏🏻

And you know what? I’d take difficult, and at times painful, rewarding, fulfilling personal work over magical thinking any day of the week.

The most surprising thing I’ve learned is that your manifestations can only come through once you’ve upleveled your self worth enough to properly and fully receive them.

In fact, I fondly describe TBM as a sort of self-guided therapy because you truly do excavate parts of yourself—the unconscious blocks and limiting beliefs—you didn’t know were playing a part in your life, even decades after they’ve left their mark.

You get to know your deepest, most hidden parts intimately. The more intimate, the better!

And when you do—when you put those dark parts up to the light and you forgive them, befriend them, and love them for the role they’ve played in making you exactly who you are now—that’s when the magic happens.

Because you get to co-create with the universe from your heart of hearts, not from ego or what you think you “should” manifest.

You call in the things that are genuinely authentic to you. Not in a personal brand way. Not in a content pillars way. Not in any way that’s for eventual consumption.

Just you. Your mind. Your heart. Your soul’s essence.

What this method of manifestation has taught me is that the universe’s only wish is for us to live fully in accordance with our most authentic selves.

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Stay with me here for a moment….

Take a breath in.

Release the breath out.

Open your heart, and imagine with me—

Imagine, even feel into your future, into the heart of your highest self. She/he is out there. She is living out every dream, every fantasy, every desire your soul has ever had. She moves through the world, her purpose, her relationships, her self worth, her faith in something greater than herself, with a level of grace and love and peace you have only a glimpse of right now.

She left the corporate job she felt unfulfilled by.

She met the partner of her dreams and shares a perfectly imperfect and everlasting love with him/her.

She found a job or created her own that utterly sparks her soul, one where she gets to share her divine gifts with the world every day through it.

When she looks at herself in the mirror, her very first impulse thought is, “Wow, I am absolutely radiant!”

She healed herself. She forgave herself and those around her who she needed to, whether they know it or not.

She looked at the ugliest, most scarred and battle-worn parts of her soul and she kissed them on the forehead. She gave them a balm only she could. She polished every tarnished piece and held it up to the light so it could shine the brightest when it was ready.

This version of you—your highest, most divine self—exists!! For me, and for you, and for every last one of us.

And really, how magical and beautiful is it that we get to co-create our best, brightest, most thriving reality with the divine as our fullest selves?

If this method sounds like something that would be rewarding and of interest, I truly can’t recommend To Be Magnetic enough. Their first step when casting your list is to write down “mini manifestations.” These work to strengthen your trust muscle in the universe as you begin the inner work.

Here was my list, if you’re curious. They all came to fruition within 30 days 🥰

Check out the program! If it resonates, you can use this link with code SARAH8397 for 15% off.

With so much love and gratitude,

Today, I’m excited—and a bit nervous in the best way—to share an update on the direction I see this Substack going for both me and you as I grow it on the journey toward uncovering my most aligned, authentic self.

What you’ll read below is a real-life, real-time retelling of alignment—of coming closer to one’s authenticity. It’s a story of exploring how one can share those gifts in a way that feels absolutely exhilarating.

I hope you’ll recognize some of the passion and curiosity to seek that I speak about in your own life.

While the exact story I share is about me, it’s a story I hear again and again nowadays from people in traditional employment that just isn’t aligned.

This isn’t just my story. It’s the universal story of a pendulum swinging back to authenticity. Back to soul-fulfilling alignment. I truly hope I do it justice.

And not just in this one post, but in every post. In every DM. In every Note, comment, phone call. Every interaction I have online or out in the world. Every move I make and dream I work towards.

Thank you so much for witnessing this story in my life. My greatest hope is that it spurs or encourages something in yours, too.

My goodness gracious… I have welcomed double the people into this community over the last 90 days!! Every time I get the notification that someone else has found enough value and interest in my writing to welcome me into their inbox, I literally rejoice.

It’s funny — until mid-March, my growth through subscriptions was fairly flat. I was publishing consistently (nearly) every Friday. So what changed?

Well, during that second week of March, I started having serious musings of what my life could feel like if I transitioned to full-time work that fed my soul. Work that felt like a way to offer my unique gifts to the world. Work that I felt divinely blessed to get to do every day. Not have to. Get to.

And guess what? Allowing myself to even wonder about taking action that would bring me closer to an aligned life gave me a flood of new eyes on my work over the next two weeks!

And when I jetted off to a “forget I am employed” level vacation to Lugano, Switzerland and Umbria, Italy that next week, I was given a divine gift. I saw artisans and craftspeople and hospitality mavens who’ve created or found work that truly lights their souls up.

In my experience, when you ask someone about their work, the light behind their eyes either dims a bit or absolutely explodes. Speaking to each one of these wonderful people reflected back an absolute fire 🔥

I am immensely grateful for that experience, since it pried my eyes wide open to a way of life where income could really and truly be made from passions. From purpose. From unique, inimitable gifts. The kind of God-given gift that only you can possess.

So, I encouraged myself to dream about soul-fulfilling work even more. Thinking about what it could look like. Crunching starting scenario and best-case scenario numbers. Outlining elements and seizing opportunities to further my own skills and passions.

And, I kept seeing writers on Substack who were transparent about their earnings. I saw new ads on Instagram of women who started insanely niche, clearly from-the-heart-and-soul businesses whose success with them was above and beyond anything they’d hoped for.

To summarize, I started at the tip of the iceberg of aligned action.

And guess what? THE UNIVERSE REWARDED ME GREATLY! I mean, double the number of people who’ve signed up to receive my work?? In just three months!!

When we uplevel our dreams to complement what our souls are truly here on this earth to do, the winds start blowing with us in a big way.

And if we get really honest with ourselves about what we truly want, we have the power to co-create absolute MAGIC.

Now, all of this goes to say that I am investing a lot of time, energy, and some money into what my writing and this Substack community can become!

Here’s a behind-the-scenes look at some of the things coming down the pike:

• A rebrand! While I started this as a spirituality blog, as you can probably tell I’ve found my bliss in writing about my journey towards finding my purpose and the learnings I want to share. So, by this summer you’ll see a new look & name, but the same insights and still an overarching belief that we’re all being guided by a benevolent, divine force. 💫

• A new monthly interview series! This series will feature people telling their own stories of leaving traditional employment to pursue their passions and purpose.

  • My first interview will feature a friend of mine who just left his very stable six-figure commercial real estate job to apprentice as a boating captain in Key West! 🚤

• New post topics!

  • About how manifestation can help us come closer to our most aligned, thriving lives.

  • About my belief in universal, divine energetics and how we can co-create with them. ✍🏻

• And more!

And, with this iteration and evolution comes the time when I’ve looked impostor syndrome in the face, cowered from it for longer than I’d like to admit, and recently said “f*ck you, I’m deserving of this and I’m going for it!”

With that……

I’ve enabled pledges for paid subscriptions, which I’ll be officially opening up this summer.

This means, if you find value in my writing and want to pre-support this next step of finding on-purpose work, it would mean the absolute world to me if you considered pledging your support.

• When you pledge now, you will not be charged.

• In the next 2-3 months when I turn on paid subscriptions (I’ll give you at least a week’s notice) you’ll receive an automatic email to let you know your card has been charged.

• And of course, you can cancel anytime.

Along with what I mentioned above, I’ll be offering Substack Live sessions, monthly community challenges for paid subscribers, and even more that’s in the works! Plus, no paywall for any of my weekly posts.

Subscribe now

Regardless of whether you pledge now, I am truly so grateful you’re here with me and we get to do this work together!! 💙💙

P.S. What’s an extravagant, on-purpose fantasy you’ve had lately that absolutely lights you up? Full-time yoga instructor? Bookstore + coffee shop owner? Amazonian wilderness guide?

I’d truly LOVE to know and cheer you on 🎉

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Being a cancer sun sign, I really connect with the summer season and find such an appreciation for all things sunshine, warmth, bounty, and the spontaneous vibes that summer uniquely brings. My recent astrology session experience helped give me the language and validation to realize that.

This week, I am thrilled to be able to share some of my lived experience that has helped me come closer to finding my purpose. If you are a Manifesting Generator (determined via a framework called Human Design — you can check yours for free, you just need to know the exact time of day you were born) or someone who finds themselves bouncing between passions and interests, this one is for you.

Please take this as permission to reframe what some people may think of as “quitting” the moment you lose interest in something to being guided by passion and what truly lights your soul up and refusing to settle for anything less.

You may have guilted yourself (or listened to others guilting you) for “not being able to commit” or “getting bored too easily.” But it’s not about that.

It’s about giving yourself the grace to move between projects, passions, interests, jobs, and containers that truly align with who you are and what you value in a given moment.

What sparks true joy and meaning at a given time in your life.

What speaks to your soul and makes you want to go all-in.

While there is immense importance in seeing your commitments through, especially if others are truly depending on you, no one gives you a medal for white-knuckling your way through something that feels out of alignment or like you’re doing yourself a disservice by continuing — and just as critically, something that you are no longer able to show up to as your full self.

So today, I’m excited to air out the random—and possibly even bizarre—threads of passion I’ve followed over the last few years. All of which were an absolute blast while they lasted, and have led me to exactly where I am today in their own ways.

Welcome to my wacky life for the last ~three years. It’s been random. It’s been out of left field. It’s been freaking awesome. There was a point in the spring of 2024 where I had my full-time corporate job, and held THREE part-time jobs.

What’s funny is, I felt so invigorated and so excited to go to my three other jobs because they didn’t feel like work. I literally would have paid them to be able to do what I was doing.

Without further ado… In the past three years, I’ve been:

🧀 A cheesemonger behind a counter of over 150 cheeses

For about a year between spring of 2023 and summer of 2024, I had a part-time job at a large local independent wine store, which had a massive cheese counter too (genius).

After being raised on Kraft singles and shelf-stable powdered “Parmesan”, I took a great deal of interest in the Trader Joe’s cheese selection during college. Their brie was my gateway drug of choice.

It got to the point where I was reading books about cheese, spending a decent bit of my corporate paycheck on cheese, visiting creameries in the Hudson Valley on the weekends, seeking out cheese shops with immense dedication during my travels regionally and abroad.

So I figured (and with the help of a very pushy in the best way friend of mine), why the heck shouldn’t I just get a part-time job as a cheesemonger? So, reader, that is precisely what I did.

I had more fun than any employee ought to, and loved fully immersing myself in the cheese world. I even made cheese friends and went to a cheese rave at a warehouse in Brooklyn!! (Mom, don’t read that)

And then, quite simply, my passion shifted. You could say it fizzled, you could say I quit. You could say I gave up. But really, I got every bit of delight and awe out of that experience and my passion for the cheese world that I was meant to. So, away we go.

The throughline:

As Glennon Doyle says, “we can do hard things.”

I’d never worked in a customer-facing role before and was a bit terrified since my main job involves monitoring an inbox in a secluded cubicle all day. But pulling the trigger and applying for this job, and then actually starting it and sticking with it, gave me the confidence to recognize that I can indeed do hard things, especially things I feel imposter syndrome about.

🍷 A wine sales associate pouring glasses for a gaggle of the best regulars ever

At the shop as where I cheesemonger-ed, it was mainly a wine shop, and cheese was really just an add-on. The majority of the business’s sales came from wine purchases.

This shop was a in a close-knit, veryy suburban and affluent town in Northern NJ. The sales of both cheese and wine were impacted greatly by how congenial and helpful the salespeople were on the floor.

When the store manager saw how well I was doing behind the cheese counter, they asked if I’d be interested in being the “Saturday Wine Sampler” who mans a wine counter and pours tastes of the featured wines of the week.

I loved wine and exploring how one of the world’s great beverages pairs with one of the world’s great foods, so it was an enthusiastic “yes” from me.

I was excited to learn more, but afraid about the customers—some of whom were extremely wealthy and very discerning (read: snooty)—would ask me technical questions I knew nothing about.

I left for many reasons. The main one was because my passions shifted, and there’s only so much time in a day! Plus, the amount of free wine I got to take home (you can’t sell open bottles) was started to feel significantly unaligned with my health goals, and I’m proud of myself for recognizing that. Nowadays, I drink alcohol about 2-4 times per month, and even that I’d like to cut back on.

The throughline:

Guess what… I did get asked lots of questions from people who knew far more about wine than I did. Plenty of them, I did not know the answers to.

But I learned that when you are genuinely enthusiastic about something and lead from authenticity and the heart, people are more than happy to support you and share knowledge — and even buy your product.

And when the few snooty folks who don’t take kindly to a bubbly young woman with limited knowledge trying to sell them something and then they make it known, bless them. Anyone who acts like that is probably dealing with a lot more than you’ll ever know.

⌨️ The Cheese Coach: cheese blogger and content creator

This passion pursuit was truly a blast. Through my instagram—The Cheese Coach—and blog of the same name, I documented all of the yummy goodness that my time as a cheese & wine professional afforded me.

And, I even made a cheese friend in my area who’s now a regular ol’ everything friend 😊

The throughline:

I mean, I think my IG Reels speak for themselves lol

Before starting my Substack though, I went back and read through my blog to hype myself up and remind myself what a good writer I am. And I totally agreed with myself.

But even more than that, I remembered that I wrote every single bit of copy myself, without the help of any AI whatsoever to proofread or critique me! AI didn’t even exist for the average consumer (I think?) three years ago! I felt sooooo hyped after that realization, and it certainly gave me a jolt of confidence to begin writing Modern Faith.

🧘🏼‍♀️ A yoga studio team member

This was my first foray into a passion that had a spiritual component, and I absolutely loved it. I have always found that yoga studios with “regulars” who come in week after week have lots of exceptional vibes, and the studio I worked for was a great example.

When in community with like-minded people who are committed to not only their physical health, but furthering their physical and spiritual practices, you just feel that you’re in concert with the divine forces of the world.

Though I wasn’t a yoga instructor, I was stationed at the front check-in desk of the studio and got the students all set for class. In exchange, I received free unlimited yoga each month. I’d do it again!

The throughline:

Much of my journey to release the Catholic perspective towards the faith of my youth was taught by yoga teachers I encountered in college and in the years after.

I really don’t think I’d be where I am in my journey of spirituality without the amazing exposure I’ve had to yoga and all of my instructors. Thank you 💕

📲 A small-business owner for social media management

Last year, I was curious about a grounded, stable, and safe way to build up side income so I could eventually transition away from corporate work.

My friend owns a high-end travel agency, and she was looking for someone to run her social media. Since I’ve worked as a freelancer by word-of-mouth and recommendations in the past, I happily partnered with her.

If you’re curious and/or want travel inspo, check out her company’s Instagram!

The throughline:

Registering an LLC with the state of NJ gave me such ✨girlboss. I loved it. And contrary to what many creatives who strike out on their own may prefer, I actually love the back-end admin of running a business.

I love keeping spreadsheets of expenses. Drafting agreements. Staying organized for tax season. One of my zones of genius is left-brain organization, and I get to lean into it as a business owner.

👩🏼‍💻 A Substacker who writes about the journey towards a fully aligned, on-purpose life that’s uniquely our own

The throughline:

This truly is “my favorite corner of the internet”. Every time I pop onto this platform, I feel lit up.

By my own capacity to create.

By other people putting out their unique perspectives and gifts, who support others that do the same.

Substack will be one of my homes for the foreseeable future, and I am absolutely honored that you’re here 💫

All this goes to say that if you have something on your mind or in your heart that’s calling to you, that keeps popping up in your field of fantasy, something you daydream about… PURSUE IT. The more random and bizarre, THE BETTER!!

This is not a dress rehearsal.

We’ve only got one chance to, as Gwyneth says, “really milk the sh*t out of this.”

You never know where it might lead.

Today I’m writing from 35,000 feet as I make my way back from a wonderful vacation with my fiancé. I’ve spent a glorious, leisurely two weeks in Lugano, Switzerland and the Umbria region of Italy.

As a foreward to this week’s post, I want to share something personal.

I’ve always been a bit reserved about money — How much someone makes. How one chooses to spend what they make. One’s ambition to make more.

Today’s post—something that’s been very strongly on my mind lately as I write about the role of purpose and the steps I’m taking to find mine—explores the role of purpose and passion in work and income. Whether you can or should make your purpose your side hustle, your job, or even your livelihood.

I have truly been in awe of so many women I’ve seen in the Substackiverse who have been able to turn their writing—the content of which is usually borne from their authentic gift(s)—into meaningful side income or even their main income stream.

Backing up a bit, I grew up with very little exposure to entrepreneurs. The norm I saw as a kid was adults who viewed their traditional jobs as something to endure. Something that, beyond the paycheck, offered very little. Something to trudge through from 9 to 5, that often was a source of dissatisfaction and loathing.

If you’ve been here for a little while, you know that I am conscious of being unfulfilled in my corporate job. (Disclaimer: I very much appreciate and do not take at all for granted the very real blessings of it—the steady paycheck, the health insurance, paid time off, a safe work environment, etc)

But as I see more and more creators leaving traditional structures of work and carving out paths of meaningful, soul-fulfilling income, I feel it in my heart and in my bones that the universe will support me if I decide I want to pursue the same.

In fact, I have utter and total faith that when ANY of us recognize an area of our lives where we are living in conflict with our unique alignment, the universe sends us messages and signs to lean into exploring how we can get back to our authenticity.

I’ve seen that many of you write Substacks or have passion projects of your own that you may be looking to grow, so please consider this your sign to explore the possibilities 💫

It’s late morning in a hilltop Umbrian town in Italy. Pasticceria owners whose doors have been long open for the day are joined by proprietors of shops lined down cobblestone streets older than my country. “Aperto” signs now grace nearly all the shop doors, announcing a town that’s open for business.

We’re in Orvieto, a beautiful, lovely town enclosed by medieval walls dating back to the 13th century.

While equipped with all the modern conveniences one would expect from a regionally well-known large town in Italy, Orvieto gives a distinct old world vibe. And not just because of the architecture, which is still going strong after almost a thousand years.

No, no, what really left an impression on me about Orvieto that I’m honored and excited to share with you, is how tightly concentrated this town was with artisans, real and true artisans who were invigorated to share their craft and creations with the world via their shops.

I patronized a ceramics shop whose studio was neatly attached to the store; I literally had to interrupt the owner from her work in order to buy my new mug!

I bought a hand-carved, hand-hewn knife from a very nice man, who graciously spent almost thirty minutes explaining how he takes a block of metal and a block of wood and creates stunning kitchen knives from the raw materials — and even demonstrated some of the process for us in his workshop right in the back of his store.

I spent a particularly lovely time in a shop that sells hand-dyed, leather-bound journals along with quills & ink pots and wax stamps — Fun Fact: I am a big proponent of journaling and have kept a journal since the fifth grade! I may or may not have picked up two that spoke to me 😉 Along with my very first quill!

Each proprietor/owner/artisan was even more happy than the last to share not only their final product with me, but their process. Their art form, their passion, and maybe even their purpose. It wasn’t about a sale, it was about appreciation. About care. Craftsmanship and craftswomanship.

Where I’m going with this is: something shifted in me in Orvieto.

Watching these artists work, speak about, and share their craft so openly, I felt what it looks like to be in full alignment with what you’re here to do. To work from a place not of financial pressure, but from devotion. And to trust—truly trust—that there is a way to be monetarily supported by your authentic gifts.

For the first time, that path didn’t feel abstract or like it was for other people, but not for me. It felt possible. Like it’s already unfolding, even 🥰

Because I’m starting to see more and more examples of it. Here. In my own life. In this community!

So while I may still be in my corporate role today, I’m starting to fully embrace and believe that it doesn’t need to be the final chapter by any means.

And I don’t have it all figured out—not even close—but I can feel that I’m on the path. That there is a path. One where purpose and income don’t have to be mutually exclusive the way I’ve believed for so much of my life.

My deepest wish—for myself, and for each of you—is that we allow ourselves to explore that path. To stay curious. To follow the universe’s and our own intuitive pings. To believe that a life that feels aligned, expansive, and deeply fulfilling is not only possible, but completely ours to pursue and find financial success in.

And that we get to figure it out in real time, together 💕

Further reading

I’m honored for the chance to get closer to our authentic purpose, together.

I’m very excited to write about my recent foray into astrology, where I had my very first birth chart reading. Since the new year, I’ve been getting pings from the universe to explore astrology more. I’ve been having this feeling that somehow, learning about astrology is going to tie into the journey I’m on to discover my purpose.

Whether astrology will actually be a part of my purpose is to be determined, but I believe that gathering all of the information about ourselves we possibly can will have an outsize effect on helping us truly know our selves as deeply as possible. And if you’ve been with me here for a little while, you know that purpose is top of mind and heart.

So, I was excited to have found through a back issue of The Retreat newspaper. Anna’s positive presence and approachability really shone through her writing, and I felt great about booking a session with her.

I am very glad I did, because I truly had such a fantastic experience and learned a lot about not only astrology—its purpose, its application potential—but also about the specific energetics at play in my own chart!

If you’re curious to book a session of your own with Anna, you will be glad you did! :)

I truly hope you enjoy hearing about my experience, and learn something if you’ve been contemplating learning a bit about how the astrologic forces can affect you in our day-to-day, and even entire lives.

And don’t miss the list of resources at the end for exploring your own astrology! Let me know what you think ☺️

For Ease of Navigation Through the Guide:

Reasons to Have an Astrology Chart Reading

Expectations Going In + What I Hoped to Gain

The Experience

General Astrology Things I Learned

Biggest Takeaways

Resources to Play and Get Curious

Glossary

Reasons to Have an Astrology Chart Reading

No matter your stage of life, no matter your journey’s direction or progression, I believe you could benefit from an astrology reading.

If you go into it with an open mind, and find an astrologer from a verifiable or trusted source like I did, then you can’t go wrong!

Maybe….

• You want clarity on the stage of life you’re in and how you can work with your unique energetics to make the most of it

• You’re curious about the aspects of your personality and propensities that reign in your day-to-day life

• You feel out of alignment in the life you’ve built

• You want to learn about your unique strengths and potential blind spots

• You want clarity on the things you’re doing and why you do them, the way something in your life has been playing out

• You’re simply curious about a new way to get to know yourself

Expectations Going In + What I Hoped to Gain

Being completely new to astrology—literally, I only knew “I’m a cancer!” and had no real clue what that means on either a stereotypical or practical basis—I went into the session with almost no expectations. I figured I’d have a casual 60-minute chat with a nice woman who was recommended via a publication I trust, and maybe learn something about myself that resonated.

Specifically though, I was hoping that some of these questions—and YES I am exactly the type of person who makes lists of literally everything floating around my head—would get answered.

If you’ve never had a reading before and you decide to, I’d recommend really giving some thought beforehand to what you’re hoping to gain from it.

Recognize that you may not necessarily get the exact answers you seek (or are hoping for) and allow for the experience to be open-ended.

Have faith to surrender the result, and trust that what’s meant to come of it will.

The Experience

Having never met Anna before, her presence was exactly what I’d been hoping for — warm, inviting, highly knowledgeable, and excited to be chatting with me.

She started by asking what my level of experience with astrology is, whether I knew of any of the components of my birth chart. My answer was a resounding “no” and that was okay!

It’s completely fine to approach an astrology session without having any knowledge of astrology whatsoever. In fact, Anna was really happy about me having a blank slate to build upon!

Right before we started digging into everything, Anna started recording our Zoom session so she could send it to me after. I didn’t realize how helpful that’d be, but I’ve already rewatched it! I highly recommend checking with your astrologer to see if they’ll record your session and send it to you after.

What are the energetics of your chart? Not necessarily who you are, but what energies you naturally lean towards, maybe are deficient in, and can cultivate and stoke at any given point in your life to enhance what you’re working towards.

~Anna Hull

General Astrology Things I Learned

• The sign we all know most commonly is your sun sign

• Even though we all have the twelve zodiac signs in our chart, there are three most prevalent signs: sun sign, rising sign, and moon sign

  • The sun sign may be what your ego or conscious mind gravitates towards

  • The rising sign is your soul’s truest expression

  • The moon sign represents your emotional inner world—how you process and respond to feelings

• My signs are

  • Cancer sun

  • Sagittarius rising

  • Virgo moon

• There are twelve houses in astrology - each represents a particular area of our collective experience. For example, the 7th house represents partnerships and relationships. The 9th house represents travel, philosophy, and higher learning.

• The North Node can signal the direction your soul is meant to grow toward in this lifetime

• The South Node represents the patterns and comfort zones you naturally fall back on, or the experiences you’ve already had in a previous lifetime

If none of these things mean any sense, that’s okay! I wouldn’t have had a clue about any of them before my session, either. If your interest is piqued, leave or comment or DM me and we can learn together!

Leave a comment

Biggest Takeaways

• My sun sign — cancer is a water sign. However, neither of my other major signs (sagittarius and virgo) are water signs. In astrology, water can be permeable, and those who have dominant water in their charts can have trouble setting boundaries. But with only a bit of water, my chart indicates I’d be perceptive rather than permeable.

  • How it landed: I totally resonate with this... I do feel that one of my authentic gifts is to perceive others’ emotions, moods, states of mind. When my social battery is fully charged, I can read + work a room with the best of ‘em. I have also worked hard to strengthen my confidence on personal boundaries in my adult life post-bullying experiences in high school, and I am thankful to now feel a lot of ease saying “no” to things that don’t align. As taught in my TBM practice: the most magnetic word is “no.”

• Cancer’s time period (June 21 through July 22) marks the beginning of summer, and summer intensifying. Flora and fauna are in the height of bloom, and they bear quite a bounty during this time. So, people with cancer sun signs are known to bring things to life, and be nurturing of their fruits in whatever form they may take.

  • How it landed: I do find a lot of satisfaction in watching something I create come to life. Feeling like I’m co-creating with the universe to birth something. Plus, to nurture someone else’s cares, worries and dreams gives me immense gratification. I think I’m good at holding space for others’ experiences, while encouraging action and thriving.

• My rising sign — sagittarius is a fire sign. It uplifts, it represents energy rising, bubbling, pushing through to the surface. It wants to move forward, move faster, go further. To learn more, to connect deeper, to make moves. The keyword for sagittarius is “freedom.”

  • How it landed: When I get the urge or idea to do something, you can count on me researching, making to-do lists, reaching out to relevant people, carving out time, and making moves to either explore it to the fullest until I determine I’m no longer interested, or until it comes to life. In the sense of nurturing my passions and interests, this is right up my alley!

• My moon sign — Virgo is an earth sign. It’s grounded, and is the sign of discernment + alchemy. Virgo discerns all of the observations and experiences one has, and alchemizes all of those data points in such a way to be most helpful to others in sharing knowledge or helping with something.

  • How it landed: You’re reading my Substack right at this very moment, right? 😉

• Interestingly, virgo falls in my tenth house—the house of career, reputation and legacy. So, when I’m living out of alignment and my soul isn’t able to pick up on the things it yearns to experience and discern, I feel it very loudly.

  • How it landed: This hit! Totally spot on, I have been questioning my alignment in my current career path, and it’s really been amplified since discovering Substack and having exposure to all the incredible writers who are living their lives out loud, and helping people via their lived experience.

Overall, we spoke about how I feel so many threads of interest and passion that I feel called to explore. But, I’ve been feeling confused because once I explore them, I follow them, and then I get bored and move on.

I’ve been guilting myself about that part quite a bit, in all honesty.

But, Anna shared that I don’t have to. I have a pretty varied chart and energetics surrounding my soul, so it’s literally only natural for my soul to express itself and follow curiosity in varied ways.

In the last three years, I’ve been a cheesemonger, a wine sales associate, a yoga studio gal, owner of a social media business, writer of this Substack, and there’s probably more I’m forgetting.

Anna gave me the cosmic permission slip I needed by showing me that not only is there immense beauty in following all these different passions, but for me — it’s the point.

Each passion I follow allows me to gain experience and wisdom that I will inform the next, and I’m building upon my lived experience in real time.

I feel even more blessed to be able to share that experience with my friends and family, and just as much with you right here 💚

The more you allow your passions to breathe and weave, the more they will flow and fulfill you.

~ Anna Hull

Resources to Play and Get Curious

• Human Design — to learn about your unique Energy Type

  • Here’s a great episode from Move With Heart all about Human Design featuring Jenna Zoe— the woman who has popularized it to be as big as it is today

• Co-Star — to get a free copy of your Natal Chart

• Anna Hull’s Substack — a lovely go-to resource straight from my astrologer

• Podcast episodes that gave me the astrology ping so far this year

  • Expanded: Why You Feel Disconnected From Your Intuition (And How to Reclaim It) with Taylor Paige

  • The Sakara Life Podcast: Finding Purpose in the Planets with Susan Miller

Have any astrology-related podcasts, Substacks, books, Instagram accounts for your dose of astrology? Let me know!!

Glossary

• Birth chart / Natal chart — A personalized snapshot of the sky at the exact moment you were born, which shape the unique energies of who you are

• Zodiac sign — Twelve archetypes that describe different personality traits and ways of moving through the world. We each have three zodiac signs: sun, rising, and moon

• Sun sign — The part of you you’re most aware of and identify with, and the most typical sign you associate with/buy jewelry based on

• Moon sign — Your inner emotional world. How you feel, process, and respond beneath the surface.

• Rising sign — The energy you naturally lead with. How others experience you and how you step into new situations

• House — A specific area of life (like love, career, or home) where different parts of your chart show up and play out

• Planet — Each planet represents a different part of you, like how you think, love, act, and communicate

• Elements (Fire, Earth, Air, Water) — The four energy styles that shape the signs

  • Fire - passionate and action-oriented

  • Earth - grounded and practical

  • Air - curious and communicative

  • Water - intuitive and emotion-oriented

I truly hope you got something out of this guide and reading about my experience as a total newbie to astrology—maybe even wanting to dip a toe in for yourself!

First impressions of our base city—Lugano—are: very clean & tidy, everyone dresses so effortlessly sophisticated (find me wearing tube socks and running shoes), and it’s a very social city at night with aperitivos & wine bars reigning supreme.

I’m very much looking forward to the “mental escape” aspect of this getaway. As you can tell from previous posts and this one below, I’ve been exploring (perseverating on?) Purpose quite a bit.

What is purpose?

Why do we feel pressure, or simply feel called, to find ours?

How do we find ours?

What do we do once we’ve gotten a glimpse—or a fully fledged eye full—of what our purpose could be?

Enjoy, and please do let me know your own thoughts on purpose in the comments 💌

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What is the purpose of purpose?

I believe wholeheartedly that the divine force co-creates with each of our souls to give us unique gifts. These gifts can then manifest as our purpose here on earth. A knack for knitting? A curiosity towards coaching? An affinity for aiding afflictions? These are all examples of purpose.

One of these examples shows thoughtfulness and perhaps provides some warmth on a brisk day. One of them can improve someone’s quality of life, career and relationships significantly. And one of them can mend sickness, injuries and even save lives.

When it comes to the deep inner work of mustering up the courage and fortitude to bring your gifts to life in the world—and honor your most authentic self through them—every gift is vitally important.

I’ve come to believe that when something is created with good, honest intentions and to the fullest extent of one’s abilities, the outcome is secondary to the process and the purity.

A recent example I found in the wilds of Instagram: I can only imagine that this woman, Lauren, who grows herbs and flowers on her farm in California and then hand-makes paper using a 17-step process, then dyes the paper with her freaking herbs and flowers(!!!) is living out her soul’s purpose.

I was truly inspired and in awe when I saw this, and signed up for her stationary subscription club right away.

Candidly, in my time of self-exploration and introspection over the past few months, I have been putting a pretty heavy amount of pressure on myself to find my purpose. I’ve been thinking that once I find my purpose, that’ll be it!

I’ll quit my corporate job and be a soul-business entrepreneur!

I’ll find fulfillment and happiness and alignment and everything will be perfect every day!

I’ll have my whole life figured out!

It mayyy have been possible I wasn’t living fully in reality.

I am very grateful for the challenge of perspective that gave me during a creative consult session I had with her. Carley, who is an Expander1 of mine, very astutely and considerately pointed out that one’s purpose doesn’t have to be their end-all / be-all.

Purpose can be something in the here and now. Purpose can literally serve a purpose during a given moment in time or season of life.

She recounted a story from ’s book Big Magic that was straightforward but immensely effective. If you’ve been grappling with your purpose and would like to relieve any pressure you may feel to find yours, I hope reading a recap of it brings you value.

As Carley told it…Elizabeth wrote about a moment as she walked past a man at the top of a ladder, painting an outdoor mural. She saw that his ladder was about to roll too far from where he was painting, so Elizabeth scurried over and held the ladder in place.

For almost an hour, she stood at the bottom of the ladder, holding it so this man could continue his mural—his art—uninterrupted. As he finished his work, Elizabeth continued on her way.

Later, she reflected on whether holding that ladder was her purpose. If helping someone else create their art and share their authentic gifts was her purpose in that moment.

I truly appreciated hearing this. I felt vindicated more than anything else.

Vindicated because if one of the world’s foremost authors of both fiction and nonfiction can assert that her purpose—regardless of timeframe—was holding a ladder so another artist could do their work without interruption, then I certainly do not have to put anywhere near the amount of pressure I had been on myself to find and live out mine!

I am exploring in my own time, and thanks very much to Carley for helping me reach that realization.

And, I’ve given myself permission to stop questioning:

• Whether I should monetize my purpose

• Whether I should aim to make my unique gifts as full-time work

• What age or stage of life I need to have my purpose figured out by

If you’ve been questioning any of these things, I hope it gives you permission, too. 💕

PS... the astrologer I had a session with spoke about purpose, too! I’ll be writing about that session and sharing findings that can apply to everyone next Friday. See you then!

After my winter of achieving nothing—and being quite proud of it—reminders of a thaw and the bloom that naturally follows seem especially fitting. I’ve receded within myself these last few months, in an effort to introspect. To peel back. To properly witness my desires, motivations, and dreams.

As I wrote in that post, I’ve learned a great deal. But what I’m even more excited by is how my journey has revealed how much there still is to learn about me.

I am a marvel. Every one of us is! A unique, beautiful, divine being with valleys and depths not even an ocean could fathom.

As I have found, with exploration into the self comes a healthy (and heavy) dose of questioning. Questioning what we’re doing with our lives. What we were put on this earth to do. To share. To give. Questioning the purpose of it all. And how what we’ve been spending our time and energy on thus far ties into—or perhaps, does not tie into—why we believe we’re here.

I’ve had plenty of “aha!” moments so far where I’ve uncovered things like:

• Getting closer to my purpose and how it can show up in what I do each day

  • Having a proper come-to-Jesus with myself and finally admitting that I want to bring something into this world that goes beyond my 9-to-5 day job—and reminding myself that it’s more than okay to let go of an aspiration I once had to climb the corporate ladder

• Limiting beliefs and blocks I’ve been carrying around from childhood, as we all do in our unique ways

  • Growing up, I really didn’t have any exposure to entrepreneurial people. My family and close adult connections had job titles that were perfectly captured by a neat and tidy one-liner that fit into someone else’s narrative. So, I’ve never seen being a founder as something “for me”

• How I can bring myself closer to my God-given Creative spark

  • I read a Substack author write, “Creativity fills the soul. Consumption drains it.” And boy does that ring true. I feel my consciousness expand and enter a state of co-creation (even for a fleeting moment) when I create, write, ideate, walk outside, express gratitude. Conversely, I can feel myself contract when I scroll Instagram for too long, obsess over my to-do list, putter around the house more than needed. Creativity is a surefire path to channeling the divinity within you.

• I truly love connecting 1:1 with people who want to find everyday ways to deepen their spiritual practice—and connect more deeply with themselves in the process

  • Who knows, maybe my purpose will manifest as a spirituality & well-being coach one day :)

And the most significant realization I’ve had so far to share with you is that every single one of us deserves to spend our time on the things that feel aligned with our purpose, even if we don’t know what that purpose(s) is yet.

I plan on spending this next Spring season still doing the inner work, but tangibly working towards bringing it to life. For me — and for you! — this can look like:

• Shooting my shot to ask people I admire (and/or feel a healthy jealousy of) how they got their start

• Investing in creative coaching sessions with digital and analog creators I admire

• Having a chart-reading session with an astrologer (!!)1

• Staying open to creative-minded cohorts that present themselves

• Catching the imposter syndrome voice inside my head and REFUSING to allow it to keep me small and comfortable, when I know the universe’s intention for me, and for every one of us, is to expansively take up every bit of space we feel called to in this world

This has been a season of discovery. Of turning inward. Of uncovering what was always there, waiting for me to be ready to see it.

And now, like the first signs of spring, I feel ready to begin bringing it to life. To follow the path I’ve been quietly co-creating with the universe—and to share what I find along the way.

It means more than I can say that you’re here with me.

If my writing ever makes you feel a little more seen, a little more understood, or encourages you to follow something stirring within you—please know I am rooting for you 💕

What will you bring to light this season?

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With so much gratitude,

I haven’t published in a little while. I’ve been doing a good bit of introspection and self-discovery work these last few weeks, and I’m proud and excited to have made some really fascinating discoveries about myself.

You know that feeling, that lightbulb moment where you plug in another piece of the beautiful, rambling, divine puzzle of you?

For me, it’s a reminder that God is always watching out for me, guiding me down my unique path.

Lately I’m reminded of a Jay Shetty podcast episode where Jay was talking about life’s seasons of growth vs. seasons of grind. There are undoubtedly times in each of our lives where we’ve got momentum, we have ideas, and we’re raring to go. To execute, to try, fail, get back up, and garner achievements (or at least outputs) to show for our efforts.

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And then there are seasons where, from the outside, it appears as if we’re not doing much of anything. To the outside observer—or even those close to you!—it looks as if you’re waiting. Watching. Stalled. Perhaps even letting the world pass you by entirely.

I find myself in such a season, reader. I find myself appearing to not be doing much. My output and material achievements have, in all honesty, stalled a bit from my normal/previous levels.

The things I’m spending my time and energy on now are things that cannot be seen or felt or witnessed by anyone but me. I have spent the year so far daydreaming, fantasizing, introspecting, romanticizing, self-regulating.

I’ve begun a journey into myself, to know myself, to free myself, to find my truest, most authentic self, to unlock all that is wild and precious and utterly myself within me.

I heard something on the To Be Magnetic podcast recently that really resonated. “You’re a human being. Not a human doing.”

So rather than feeling discouraged, disheartened, or embarrassed at how I may be perceived by others, I find myself more and more excited by what I’m coming to learn every day.

I have been blessed to have experienced more “lightbulb” moments of self-discovery for what I really desire out of my days and my life at large in the last three months than I have in all my years.

None of it would have been possible if not for my faith in a benevolent force, far greater than myself or any of us individually. By now, you know that I believe God (or the divine or the universe or whatever I feel like calling it in a given moment!) is always looking out for me, always guiding me. Always guiding each of us.

But as I’ve done more to connect with my most authentic, most magnetic, and unique self, I’ve been called to believe even more strongly that the divine is within me. I am the divine—we all are. We all have divinity within us, and it’s our souls’ birthright to have a relationship with it.

And once we do, we become magnificently, beautifully, unstoppably us.

My goal for all of the introspection work is to discover what my purpose is. I believe each of us has a purpose—a higher calling, if you will—to share our unique and inimitable gifts with the world.

Expressing one’s unique gifts may look like becoming a doctor or a lawyer. It may look like becoming a content creator who shares videos/articles/podcasts on a topic they feel passionately about. Or it may look like opening up a coffee shop with the intention of infusing joy and serenity into the days of each person who walks through their door.

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I’m not sure where my purpose lies now or where it might lead me. But a Substack-made new friend of mine, , recently reminded me that we each get one life here on earth. We each get one lifetime, brimming with potential, to explore and to bring to fruition that which lies within our hearts.

So why not do all we can to bring the life of our dreams into fruition? And become closer to our most divine selves in the process.

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